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Sisters….. don’t beleive a thing they say!!!

It’s an on-going joke between Lil Sis and myself about her hypochondriatic ways. (Is that even a word?) To put it lightly…. she tends to over react! So really…… I should have known!!!! Walking into the park… yep… walking… that’s me… cause that’s my new mode of transport….. her son calls her complaining of leg pain.

ImageNow, he’d been to the gym the day before after not going for some time and over did it on the weights. So of course his legs were hurting him! She directed him to his bed and we continued onto the park for a lovely afternoon.

Now, bearing in mind that this woman is an ex nurse… yes…. an ex nurse…..  I take her medical opinion seriously, though I should know better after the incident years ago when Middle was just a tot. Middle Child had taken a little tumble and hit her head in day care. The normal course of action is to monitor for 24 hours in case of concussion. However, Lil Sis had me running into the Emergency Room holding Middle Child in my arms screaming

“Brain fluid… brain fluid… she has brain fluid coming out of her ears….. HELP!!!”

ImageI looked a right imbecile. I’m sure every doctor in there was snickering in the corner wondering what psych ward I had escaped from. It turned out Middle had a little weepy wax which was barely visible just inside her ear. Personally I hadn’t even seen it, but my sister?! She gave my child a thorough examination and declared her not just concussed but nearly dead and sent me packing off to the ER having insisted she had brain fluid coming out of her ears….. did I learn????


The morning after my nephew’s work out at the gym, I got a call at some ridiculous hour in the morning insisting that said nephew was at home and I had to rush over there IMMEDIATELY! I was just tying up my walking shoes to continue my training for my walk of death and reached for the car keys instead.

She explained that his condition had worsened through the night and he had the mother of all headaches. She had called out an ambulance at about 6:30 that morning because she was concerned about a DVT. The paramedics inspected him and ordered her to monitor him.

Yep! MONITOR…. you know that thing you do for 24 hours?!

She left him home and went to work, calling him on her way there from the bus. Apparently he didn’t answer the phone…… Diagnosis: DVT travelled and he’s laying unconscious on the floor.

ImageI sped across town to rescue him from the jaws of death, not having questioned Lil Sis’ powers of diagnosis at all…. because that’s what you do right? When family calls and say they need you, you run! I couldn’t run there fast enough so I drove. FAST!

Got there and what do I find…. he’s lying on the sofa watching TV, exhausted because the paramedics woke him at the crack of dawn. I asked him why he didn’t answer the phone….. his response….

“My legs hurt cause I over did it in the gym and I couldn’t be bothered to get up and answer it”.

No worries…. panic over. Crisis avoided and I carried on with my day happily. Walked around the town for the next few days as I am in super diligent training and what the hell happened????


So thanks Sis…… I won’t be speeding over to yours in a hurry next time you shout “Medical emergency! Get here….. STAT!” (Yes… I watch ER!) I’ll be walking over cause I won’t have a driving licence anymore! Good thing I’m doing all that walking training then!

My training for my 100km London to Brighton walk is going well though I have to admit…. my muscles are killing me! I’m still collecting sponsorship/donations for SENSE, the charity I am walking in aid of on May 12/13 2012. You can read the original story here or click the links below for more information or to donate. I will soon be starting a fund for my soon to be hired driver’s salary for when I lose my license as well!!! 🙂



Posted by on April 3, 2012 in Uncategorized


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The Baggage List

Today I received the baggage list for what I will need with me on my walk of death. I have been a bit worried about this over the last few days and worried about how I will hydrate and nourish myself over the 100km. For the most part it is off road and there won’t be a McDonalds in sight. Not only won’t there be a hamburger around, but there will be no water source either. Bearing in mind I will start walking at 7 a.m. on the 12th May and I won’t finish till about noon on the 13th, I figure I am going to need some sort of replenishment, even if only of the caffeine variety to get me through the night.

ImageRecently a friend of mine told me I had to ensure my back pack was filled with bananas because I would need the potassium to stop myself from cramping. Now bananas are heavy items and I figure that will hold me back so I am going to have to find potassium in the pill variety! Light and easy to carry.

ImageI have been walking for hours every day despite the fact that I am either carrying or pushing about 35k in extra weight in the form of Toddler Child. I figured that though this was weighing me down, it would be great training and would make the walk of death less fatal. This training has however already started killing me. For starters, I am falling asleep by about 8 p.m. most nights, I can feel my muscles burning. My core muscles in particular are clearly strengthening up. Why is it though that getting fit which is supposed to be a good thing hurts so much? My fluid intake has increased phenomenally. I think I am now drinking about 6 litres of fluid a day. I wake in the morning and I am STARVING….. My eating habits are completely out of whack. I used to be a grazer. I’m so exhausted at night though, I’m not munching my calories in the evening, I’m falling asleep over my dinner plate! My portions have increased and I am generally eating like a horse. All I can hope for however is that I will have the legs of an eighteen year old racehorse by the time I am finished all this exercising and training!

I was fortunate enough to have a local business sponsor the servicing of my bicycle and I am so thankful to them for this. This will make it easier to “train”. Though cycling is not the same as walking, it’s an easier form of exercise to get fit with Toddler Child literally in tow behind me. I can actually get some proper pace in.

Coming back to the baggage though. That back pack I was worried about. I have become increasingly worried as I have been wondering now more about the fluid intake than McDonalds. How on earth am I going to carry all this water I have been drinking and will need on my walk? Will I pass out from dehydration between stops? So maybe carting 35k of Toddler hasn’t been to my advantage at all but exactly what I will need? I got the official email stating what I will need in my pack. Sounds like it will weigh about the same as a small child.





ImageTheir list included not just water and food which I already knew was going to be heavy enough but a whole change of clothes, spare shoes, bandages, sunblock, hats, clothes for layering and warmth in the night, a whole first aid kit with bandage care and antihistamine for bug bites and nettle rashes, head torch and hand torch for night walking…. might I point out that spare batteries needed as well and last time I checked…. they’re not light! Will also need wet wipes and disposal bags to keep the used ones on me in appreciation of the environment for my toileting needs. Crikey… the list goes on and on…..

So the way I look at it… I might not be at an advantage doing all this training pushing Toddler Child around but perhaps what I actually need to do is borrow her push chair and take it with me. Might be better to push than to carry right?!

The sponsorship has been coming in nicely and I am so appreciative to all of you who have been sending funds, kind words of support and who have been cheering me on. Please continue to spread the word and encourage others to donate/sponsor. Please use the Virgin Money Giving Link to send funds directly to my chosen charity SENSE who do amazing work for the deafblind and their families.


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Posted by on March 31, 2012 in Uncategorized


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They’re not dumb…. you are. Have some SENSE!

It seems like yesterday, or not so long ago but how times have changed. First Born has been communicating with me a lot about how attitudes towards the deaf have changed so much in his lifetime, and it is true. They really have, but there’s still so much to be done to raise awareness.

I remember years ago when I was a young girl, there were a couple of families within our extended social circle that had children with “differences”. I never met them though. I think very few did. This was the way back in those days. “Difference” was to be hidden. To be “different” was taboo and was never acknowledged or spoken about.

As times moved on and the education system changed, inclusion became a hot potato and society was forced to deal with having children like these in and amongst them in mainstream schools. I’m so happy that I’m the age that I am and I didn’t have my son in those times. Society’s views were not moving as fast as those of the government or the parents of lesser abled kids or even the children who had these difficulties. Though integrated into mainstream schools, they were still shunned.

I read a book when First Born was still toddling, “The Feel of Silence” by Bonnie Tucker. Tucker grew up in America in the 40s. She lost her hearing at the age of two and was forced to continue to be aural though profoundly deaf. Her parents never let it be known that she had a hearing problem and her mother went to great pains to teach her how to use her voice. It’s a read I highly recommend, even if you have no ties to anyone with hearing loss or other type of “difference”.

Tucker’s book is a funny, witty and intimate memoir of her life. I remember being blown away by how this remarkable woman got through life in a hearing world without support from others as her deafness was unknown to all but her immediate family. Things I was taking for granted like waking in the night when my baby cried to tend to his needs. Tucker had to train herself to wake and check on her babies intermittently through the night.

She had a successful career as a lawyer, married and had children, divorced and continued to raise them on her own. I take my hat off to this woman and give her every credit for her success. As heart warming as her story is however, it’s not a true picture of how the deaf world can be. She lived in a time when “differences” were hidden away. She survived. Not only did she survive. She has an incredible success story.

Sadly though, mainstream society is fooled into thinking that all deaf people can speak. They assume that all deaf people can lip read. Like it’s some sort of compensation from God….. “I’ll take away your hearing but give you the gift of lip reading”.

No no no no no!!!! It doesn’t work like that!

I used to get so fed up of explaining this to people over and over and over again. You can’t just shout louder. You can’t just make a deaf person hear, or talk. It’s like a double edged sword though however. We want society to change and to embrace difference. But how are they meant to embrace it unless they are educated into what that difference entails. As a parent of a deaf person, or for a deaf person it’s probably worse. The incessant questions are tiresome. I say this is tiresome for deaf people but to be honest, it’s tiresome when dealing with any type of “difference”.

Society is in a state of metamorphosis right now. People are open to being educated about difference and to embracing it into everyday lives. We live in a time now where society is ripe for including all levels of ability – physical, mental and emotional – into what will become “normal” one day. A time where we won’t have “disabilities” hidden away or sectioned off into safety zones. We want to aim for a time when we recognise that;


The education of difference must continue.

I can advocate for deafness and some other differences. For instance; I can tell you that how aural a deaf person is depends largely on how profound or small a hearing loss they have, when they lost their hearing. Perhaps they already had speech? More importantly, I can tell you that lip reading is not a given. It is a gift and even then it must be honed and worked on. The same way a person has an artistic skill, they may have a lip reading skill. To an extent yes, it can be learned but really successful lip readers have a gift.

Often I would be asked when I said my son was deaf, “Can he talk?” I would try to explain that because he was so profoundly deaf AND had never heard speech that this was difficult. I would often hear the term “Deaf and Dumb”. This really old fashioned term used to make me so angry. Angry at the person using it, angry on behalf of my son who is in fact one of the most intelligent people I know and I would hear myself screaming inside…


Times have changed though. We hardly hear terms like that at all anymore. The movement for deaf people has been amazing. It’s a hard task to do as an individual though sometimes. For a deaf person I imagine they want to experience life, not continually explain their existence and deafness to everyone. I certainly know as a parent I found it tiresome, wanting to enjoy a day at the park with hearing peers and their children but finding myself having to explain “deaf” rather than just enjoy the day.

This is why organisations like SENSE are amazing. They work to raise awareness in society and clear a path so that the deaf/blind/deafblind may enjoy life; rather than explain it and go into the world without fear of ridicule, questions, even a raised eyebrow or slighted glance and just be themselves.

Please help me to help them continue in their plight to offer the support and advice to the individuals, families and communities of people like my son so that they may enjoy the things in life that we take for granted. Click on the Virgin Giving Money link to sponsor me in my 100km walk on May12/13th 2012 in their honour. If you would like to read more about my family’s story and why I’m doing this walk, please click here.

Spread the word, share these stories and let’s see if we can raise the £3,000 target I;ve set to try and raise. In the meantime….. I’ll keep walking in my efforts to train for this event. (If anyone knows a good masseur who’s willing to meet me at the finish line, I’d be most grateful! 😉 )

P.S. If you think lip reading it that easy, put on a pair of headphones, play your music really loud and try to see if you can interpret what someone is telling you. Also, if you ever do encounter a deaf person, don’t be afraid to try to use gestures, even if you can’t sign. Use facial expressions for sure and if you’re really struggling to communicate, don’t give up; use a pen and piece of paper, or type it out on your phone. All deaf people try to follow some lip patterns as well, regardless of how good they are at lip reading. Don’t shout at them. Speak slower and try to emphasise your lip pattern (WITHOUT patronising them). Keep your lips toward them and don’t block your mouth. Have a look at the video clip in the link below.

The deaf don’t want to be patronised OR ignored.

They just want to be heard too!!!

Thank you again to all of you who have been donating and sending kind words of support. If you can’t help by donating just a pound or two, please help by raising awareness of this challenge by sharing, spreading the word or help by raising awareness on behalf of deaf people by sharing what you may have learned today!!!


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Dear Marlboro… I’m suing your a$$!!!

Dear Marlboro,

Just thought I would give you a little heads up about the civil CLASS ACTION suit I am planning on bringing against you. Not only did you falsely advertise yourself but you have now turned me into an alcoholic!

Firstly….. you creep into my life completely unwantedly and falsely advertise in front of me on television and on billboards that I will be this completely sexy womanly person if I smoked your cigarettes. And you have to admit Mr Marlboro Man…. it was false!! What the hell is sexy about a woman who stinks of old nicotine. That smell gets everywhere, in your hair, your clothes, it comes through your darned pores! Not to mention the disgusting smoker breath and I can’t even begin to imagine how kissing an ashtray is meant to be sexy. It’s not like it even tastes good either!

Now if your false advertising wasn’t bad enough and having lured me into stinking worse than the inside of chimney breast…. you never really did warn me effectively about the addictive properties of smoking before you shoved your product between my lips. And we’re not even going to mention the late addition of all the health risks of which I would really like to add a couple!!!

So next thing now… I have your cancer sticks in my mouth on a regular basis when finally you decide to come clean and tell me that it could kill me with your ostentatious labels… well thanks… it’s a bit late for that now isn’t it???!!! Cause now I can’t seem to just put these things down! I’ve had to battle with my will, use all sorts of crutches like patches, microtabs, inhalers, e-cigs and hypnotherapy only to find that you just keep shoving your way back into my life until you nearly kill me and I couldn’t pick you up even if I tried.

What you didn’t tell me though… was that one day you were going to give me a cough so darned bad that I would end up BREAKING MY FLIPPING RIBS and SPRAINING MY RIB CAGE through coughing…… I mean to say…. a SPRAINED RIB CAGE?! I didn’t even know that injury existed! So thanks a whole flipping lot. I need you to add to your health warning this,,,,

“Smoking causes disgusting hacking cough which may cause your ribs to break”

You sure conveniently left that one out didn’t you…. and might I add, that there is NO painkiller under the sun that eradicates this pain and allows you to function like a normal human….. a HIGH human yes… but normal no…. I’ve been told I won’t be right for about 6 months. Here’s the great part…. I still have an infection in my lungs thanks to you and the only way I can get it out is by coughing….. Except for the fact that every time I so much as breathe too deeply I feel like someone has kicked me in the ribs with a steel toe boot!!!!

So not only have you knocked years off of my life span, you have now also robbed me of 6 months of my living years, added to which…. I am now at risk of becoming addicted to either painkillers or alcohol thanks to you. I did notice on New Years Eve that I mysteriously had no pain and danced the night away after a bottle or so of wine and am now completely aware of how my hand automatically reaches for that wine glass night after night when that pain strikes me as I try to perform even the most mundane of tasks such as simply washing my dishes.

I firmly beleive it to be your fault as well that the best years of my life were lost along with the opportunity of a wonderful relationship and famuly life cause I carried your stench everywhere I went but you’ve really done it…. bringing these other addictions to my door…… You’re the worst thing that every happened to me you lying, cheating bastard! I’ll see you in court!



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For 26 days of the month I am normal. Well, as normal as I come anyways. But for those 26 days of the month everyone and everything else comes first. To be honest, besides shovelling down some food as fast as I can for lack of time, showering for a few quick minutes each day and possibly if I have time putting on a little make up, I manage to get maybe six hours sleep. The rest of my time is dedicated to making sure everyone else’s lives run smoothly.

For just two days….. TWO days, you hear that????


I just want everyone to back off and leave me alone.




Just me.

No one else.

I don’t care about the particular pair of black socks with little pink stars on them. I don’t give a damn if they are in the wash, under the bed or in the car. Find them yourself and better yet, wash them if you want clean ones. In fact. Don’t even bother me with your issue. Wear the black ones with white spots on for all I care. Would it really kill you to do that?

I don’t care about what YOU want for dinner…… or breakfast…. or lunch. We’re having what I want. END OF. If you don’t want it, make something yourself. And don’t make a mess in my kitchen either. Get in, get out and make sure it looks like you were never there.

Let me explain something to you…. I try to channel myself for TWO days a month so I don’t have to affect anyone else. I take all that negative energy and turn it into something constructive. My assistant at work…. I love her….. had a bit of a shock the first time she encountered it. She came in and I had emptied the WHOLE supplies closet. It’s more like a room in size to be honest. But I was so fed up of the mess I inherited, I waited till it was PERSONAL ME TIME and I attacked that thing like there was no tomorrow. She was smart. She left me alone. She took direction without question when I wanted some help but the rest of the time, she said nothing, she did nothing and most importantly… I DID NOTHING TO HER. Two days later… everything was back to normal and we had the most fabulously clean and organised supplies store in the country.

Now, if you can’t accept the fact that if you leave me alone then I will leave you alone and wonderful things like rooms being repainted or curtains being made and installed or that shower that hasn’t been working right for months will get fixed, be prepared to have your head chomped right off.

In the event that you are an argumentative so and so and you prefer the term PMS to PMT… then get this. I got you there too.


It’s my PERSONAL MIND SPACE time then.

A time of the month when I want to regroup. Assimilate my thoughts and get some sleep and not have everyone else’s thoughts being injected into my head. I hope I am being clear. With that….. I’m leaving….. PLEASE….  do YOURSELF a favour and go in the other direction.

Thanks…… now you sleep well now… see you in two days!!! I’m off to have a super long shower, paint my toe nails and I’m going to put up that curtain rail I have been meaning to do for about ten months. AND NO….. I DON’T WANT YOUR HELP EITHER.

We’ll laugh about this in a couple of days…. I promise. In the mean time… pretend I am invisible and that I’ve gone on holiday or something.


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Posted by on October 27, 2011 in Uncategorized

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